i think i'm romantiy retarded i'm in my early xs, the only serious relationship under my belt is a year-long from over a decade ago. i'm attractive, smart, fun, etc. but I have the most terrible luck with men. When I'm not having prolonged dry spells, I'm falling for guys are either too far away or emotionally detached or broke or are taken, or recently out of a long term relationship. Losing hope, but don't want to be al Sigh.

You seem to be going for unavailable men you might want to figure out why in therapy.

i'm your male counterpart. let's hook up

Something in your personality is a deal breaker because "attractive, fun, smart" girls do not stay single past x. In fact, they are hunted to extinction.

i am really independent and can be kinda bossy maybe i don't flirt enough. i wish i could really zero in on it and combat it.

do you prefer giving orders or asking questions? also, are you people oriented or task oriented?

i'm good at both, actually i've been a boss but i don't mind asking questions. fuck, i don't know actually. i've been accused of being passive aggressive in my xs but i think i've gotten past that. i think my passive aggressiveness affected my romantic progress, perhaps.

which do you prefer? depending on which personality type you are, your best match is your opposite for example, donald trump likes to give orders, and is task oriented, so his best match is someone who asks questions and is people oriented

i guess i'm more of a trump if it really came down to it. since hood, i've liked being in control and doing things myself with minimal supervision. although, i do enjoy collaborating, if it's with the right person. so what would be my match then?

yeah, but trump doesn't like doing things himself, he likes giving orders to others while he sits on his worthless ass and watches them work when interacting with others, do you prefer ordering them around, or asking them questions?

a little bit of both if i do "order," i'm pretty considerate, i think. but i can be very firm. just recently i was in charge of a house renovation project and managed a team of contractors. i had no problem telling them what to do, and they did it. completed the project on time, and later told a colleague of mine that they liked working with me and that i was 'tough' but in a good way. that's what i am, generally -- pretty tough. which maybe may scare some men away. i'm not a wallflower, that's for sure. but i'm very sweet. maybe it's a result of my tough love upbringing or growing up in a big city, i dunno.

your match would probably be someone who likes to ask questions, and is people oriented the male version of Edith Bunker there's a book, The Platinum Rule, that discusses the x basic personality types

thanks but, i have not the slightest clue where or how to find this person. Sigh.

what do you think it is?

some guys like bossy. that isn't it

what oh what could it be then? maybe I'm just not out there circulating enough.

without meeting you in person, I would have no idea. sometimes I think the bay area is terrible for dating though, for some reason I haven't figured out yet.

i'm not in the bay area another big city though.

I think you are emotionally afraid... not romantiy retarded.

but i'm very sensual and loving and not afraid of affection. what could i be emotionally afraid of? i don't know. my parents have a crappy relationship, although they're still married. my mom is totally dependent on my dad and maybe watching them, i've subconsciously have put up some guards, afraid of being controlled by a man the way my dad controlled my mom. but that's just a theory. it may not be that deep.

Emotionally afraid... of commitment. Giving your heart to someone else... to possibly have it broken.

just had my heart broken recently by some it wasn't very serious, but was intense. an intense fling, you could say. i went into it very openly, but it didn't end so well -- for me. so that can't be it. i'm not afraid to love, it's definitely not that.

OK... maybe just bad luck. That could change. Meet men doing the things you love to do.

You choose unavailable men so you can love them without ever worrying that they are going to try and control you. They are elusive, you get to pursue them.

well, good, available nice guys are just

You're immature and into drama

but i want monogamy, i do want commitment i guess these guys just happen to be unavailable, but i'm attracted to their other qualities -- smart, creative, funny, ambitious, etc. I do want commitment, I want the same man to go to bed with every night, a partner, a companion. That's what I want.

have you lost that lovin feeling? whoa, that lovin feeling (sorry, off on a tangent)

i think you.. are just falling for the wrong guys. i learned early on to weed out the guys that i could never have a real relationship with. yes it's hard to tell with certain guys, but for the most part you can figure out early on what a guys wants with you. if he's taking things too fast, he just wants to get in your pants and if he's on and off with his feelings or interest he's probably not ready for a relationship. i'm sure you have probably heard these things before, but nothing is wrong with you. yes we all make mistakes and sometimes we do things we regret, but how can you know what you're doing wrong or doing right, when you're dating the wrong guys?

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