Happy Ending Problems Ok, I have been into kink (submissive) for years, am divorced and meeting women usually is not an issue. My problem comes from being able to cum. I get hard no problem, stay hard no problem, but cannot for the life of me cum during vanilla sex. When I am with a Mistress or couple and playing on the sub side its not an issue. Anyone else have this happen to them?

Sounds a touch like addiction. Also, you may be experiencing a bit of a hangup--now that you're aware that you seem unable to come during vanilla sex, perhaps that thought sits in the back of your mind and nags at you and causes performance anxiety. You can retrain yourself to enjoy vanilla to its fullest, but you've got a relax and be really into the person you're with. Or you can just accept submissiveness as your sexual preference and not bother with vanilla anymore, if you'd rather. I dunno.

Yes she does, doesn't she? Mycents- Can you fantasize? Get into your head and "think kink" when you want to cum?

Fantasize I try that during vanilla sex and it dosent work, it does when I masturbate but then I am usually using things on myself.

My $x.x: I'm wondering if being single is new for you, and you're just "feeling your oat's" right now? Perhaps you're just trying to get IT, and the only way you associate IT is with kink?? Yeah for you being able to get hard and stay hard!! That's a great beginning!!

Thanks Neg Fairy - missed you too!!

You should mature searching sexual dating better!!!

Whatcha mean?

T'was a joke... You "missed" the neg fairy... kinda like using a weapon or shooting pool... your mature searching sexual encounter was off...

Oh! Nah, doesn't matter what I post - I have my fairy following me. Nice to meet you.